Homeschool, A Journey Into Fear and Freedom
Photo credit: Jackie Kern via Flickr |
We're homeschoolers, our little family. We've been homeschooling since Miss Ann Elliot was in second grade, Mr. Knightley was a kindergartener and Miss Marianne Dashwood was a toddler. Today Miss Elliot is 21 and finishing up her bachelor's in biblical studies, Mr. Knightley has graduated and is pursuing his goal of becoming a youth pastor, and Miss Dashwood is the lone student left in our little homeschool. It does seem like the beginning of the end of this journey these days. I can see the years ahead, post homeschooling, a little more clearly.
Photo credit: Justin Kern via Flickr |
Actually, what I should say is that I can see those years after homeschooling at all. I can see them now. They're there in front of me, not that far down the road. And it causes me to reflect on the journey that homeschooling has been. The littlest things bring to mind the realization that we are in our lasts... our last student, our last read aloud, our last field trip, our last co-op classes, our last studies in pajamas, the last time to be interrupted so someone can tell me what they just discovered for the first time. Yes, we'll still have those times as a family but the unique, specific act of homeschooling will be over soon. And I want to hold on to all these good memories as closely as I can.
But homeschooling wasn't all roses and tea parties (although there were years where tea time played a favored part). It wasn't field trips every week, as a matter of fact we went months without doing anything fun at times, months wondering if what we WERE doing was working. It was a hard journey a lot of days. There were many days I couldn't see anything past the thing we were curently struggling with. I couldn't see the beauty in the process because the process was hard and caused fear and trepidation.
From the beginning it was a journey into fear. Fear that we were making the best decision for our children, fear that we were choosing the right battles, the correct curriculum, the best conversations, the most effective ideas and plans. Should we push the one child to do more math? Should we have this other child tested for Dyslexia? Should we chose a different discipline for that character trait? Should we take the week off to enjoy time with dad even though we're behind our planned schedule? Are the months of caring for an ill relative going to affect the progress they are making academically?
There's so much to be concerned about in this journey of home educating our kids. The steps we take haven't been paved before because our family is unique; our children are each unique and we are always working to tweak and improve the process, make the journey more effective, more efficient, more profitable for them, for us as a family. It's so easy to walk in fear.
Photo Credit: Bob via Flickr |
The thing is, God doesn't call us to walk in this fear or make decisions for our homeschool in fear, though. We know that He will guide us if we ask and that we can trust Him to lead us. There were so many times in our homeschool I would find myself forgetting this simple truth. And so many times I needed to be reminded of the other, most important aspect of this journey we call homeschooling. The thing that holds way more power than fear if we acknowledge it, if we allow God's plan for a fear free walk to point us towards this truth. The truth that homeschooling gives us something we can not get with any other way of educating our children: FREEDOM! This freedom is so much stronger than any fear that we hold. Homeschooling gives us:
- Freedom to educate these unique children the way we feel called to do
- Freedom to change the schedule when something more pressing presents itself
- Freedom to scrap a resource when it JUST. ISN'T. WORKING.
- Freedom to take time off to enjoy family, friends, or just each other
- Freedom to teach to our kids strengths, while still shoring up some weaknesses
- Freedom to stop and listen and not miss those little nuggets in the day
- Freedom to let our kids soar
- Freedom to let our kids fail
- Freedom to let our kids be challenged
- Freedom to acknowledge that this journey is hard
- Freedom to get help from friends when you need it
- Freedom to ____________________
What has homeschooling given you freedom to do? Share your fears and freedoms in the comments.
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